Chasing Sunlight

I’m up early this morning (3:00 AM) as I woke up and could not fall back asleep. As I wait for the sunrise, I began to ponder Wisconsin winters and my growing trepidation for their arrival each year.

I am not a hard-core hater of winter. I enjoy many aspects of the season. From the initial snowfall and festive holidays of December, through the brisk temperatures of January and February, to the predictable blizzards and subsequent thawing in March, the seasonal variations can be invigorating. In addition, I love a plethora of winter sports including curling and hockey.

The single element that drags me down every winter is the darkness. My mood is infinitely improved when I wake up to a cloudless blue sky and streaming sunlight. The relationship between the darkness of shorter days and depression is well known. It even has its’ own medical diagnosis, Seasonal Affective Disorder, or SAD. The lack of sunlight causes chemical changes in our body’s melatonin and serotonin levels which impact appetite, sleep, and mood.

I have found Wisconsin winters to be downright gloomy. It seems to me that for every bright sunny day, there are five cloudy days. Along with the shorter hours of daylight, this gloominess wears on me more and more each year. So last summer, I decided I was done with the winter gloom and the overcast that affects my mood. Instead of enduring the slow methodical thaw of winter I would chase the sunshine to southwest Utah.

By the time you all read this, I will be in Utah taking in the splendors of Utah’s mighty five National Parks. I hope to log many miles hiking the numerous trails in the area and absorb the beautiful expansive vistas, slot canyons, and unique geography of southern Utah. In addition, Morgan has obtained a permit for the two of us to hike Angel’s Landing, one of the country’s most notorious and dangerous hikes. Given my history with steep trails, I plan to be extremely cautious.

My mood, however, has not been exclusively tied to the weather. It has also been impacted by the state of affairs around the world. I have avoided discussing anything political in these reflections and will continue to do so. But I have been disheartened by a general lack of empathy and human kindness in the world. Even more so the purposeful cruelty of some.

For example, the other day a TikToker popped up in one of my social media feeds who deliberately seeks out panhandlers to give them fake money. He recounts giving fake five dollar bills out to protest panhandling. He gleefully expresses his desire for the panhandler to be arrested for attempting to pass the counterfeit currency. Fortunately, I live in an area where panhandling is not a problem. I understand, however, the concern this behavior creates if it becomes pervasive in an area.

But instead of working with community leaders or local law enforcement to address the issue, this individual’s course of action seems heartless and cruel. My sadness is compounded by the millions of views the video receives. To me, this behavior and those cheering it seem petty and small.

To jettison the gloominess of winter’s remnants and my dour mood, I plan on chasing sunlight in Utah. I will be attempting to make my little corner of the world a better place by demonstrating empathy and kindness. If more of us do that, maybe spring will arrive a little sooner each year.